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Month: June 2010

A Simple Guide to Reducing Anxiety During Times of Difficult Waiting

When I taught third-graders, I was great at wait-time ~ that time that passed between my asking a thought-provoking question, and my student responding. Sometimes I’d wait 60 seconds or more. Because I fostered respect and patience in my classroom, my students were comfortable with wait-time. They (usually) used the time trying to come up with an answer, rather than snickering, yawning, or burping (more on third-graders in another post).

The ability to endure wait-time is an important life-skill. Waiting for an answer, a phone call, or a text can be frustrating when you’re trying to make plans for dinner. It can be heart-wrenching when you’re waiting for the results of a medical test, a much-needed job interview, or for a loved one to see the light at the end of a dark tunnel.

When we allow the wait-time to consume our thoughts, we can feel helpless and anxious. It becomes increasingly difficult to let go.

After we’ve said our prayers, taken a casserole to a friend in need, or cried until we can’t cry any more….then what?


We can baby-sit that hole in the pit of our gut while we wait for time to pass, or we can switch our thought-patterns by doing something constructive. Here are some suggestions…

1. Write a letter, a blog post, a grocery list, or a song. Focus on something other than the uncomfortable wait. If you don’t know where to begin, open google.docs. You’ll find a blank page waiting to be filled. Just start writing whatever comes to mind. The words don’t matter, the action does.

2. Go through your bookshelf and box up some books for a children’s hospital, nursing home, or treatment center. There are plenty of folks there enduring painful waits, as well. When I’m reluctant to get rid of something, I say to myself “I think I’ll let someone else use this for a while.” Let go of the physical, let go of the emotional.

3. Clean out your car. Say a quick prayer of gratitude, then put on some music and get busy. Use a soft paint brush to clean around the knobs, switches, and a/c vents. If you don’t own a car, clean your bike. Be proud when you’ve finished.

4. Walk an errand. Even though you usually drive to the drugstore, is it close-enough to walk? Maybe you’ll need to trek through an open field or along the roadside to get there. All the better if there’s no sidewalk. The new perspective will do you good.

5. Spend some time with a good book. Fix a cup of hot tea, and allow yourself to relax and enjoy, even if there are dirty dishes in the sink.

6. Clean out your junk drawer. Yes, we all have one….well everyone except Leo and Everett. Throw out the junk and treat yourself to a latte with the spare change you find.

If you’re in for a potentially long wait...

7. Head for the beach, the mountains, or the desert. Wonder at the age of the rock formations…virtually unchanged since before any human laid eyes on them. Be grateful for spiritual renewal as you come into authentic contact with the earth.

8. Renew a forgotten hobby. Many of us who aren’t very good waiters tend also to push our own interests aside. Pull out your scrapbooking goodies and lose yourself in some happy memories. An ongoing project is perfect for a potentially long wait. I’m inspired by Susan Loughrin’s mandala project.

9. Volunteer. Don’t spend too much time searching for your dream volunteer position…just dive in. Help out at the hospital gift shop, feed doggies at the rescue shelter, or make arrangements to read with a child each week at a nearby school. There are plenty of worthy causes out there.

Constructive waiting eases our pain. When I choose to spend my wait-time constructively I’m in much better shape to cope with the bad news, or to celebrate the good news, when the wait is over. I think you’ll find the same is true for you.


If you found something helpful in this article, please share it with a friend. Maybe it’s just what they’ve been waiting to hear.

Thanks, and take good care!

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